I’m Writing

I’m writing this to everybody who doesn’t know me. That’s pretty much everybody, I guess. I don’t write about myself often. One reason is that I don’t find me all that interesting compared to the Lord, who is the purpose of my writing. And another reason is conversation and writing have always been relatively complex for me and have all my life. That is, I tumble over my words and easily get misunderstood. I can understand that. If I met a person who spoke precise English for one moment. Then suddenly, said a stream of words in a language never heard before; I think it would confuse me more than a little. The words don’t always come out the same way they sound in my brain. There’s a name for whatever causes it, but I’m not much for labels. Maybe God made me a language eunuch according to His purpose.

Most folks seem to hold in high esteem people who are good communicators and have a great fluency of words in writing. I understand that, too. I learned to dance the first time I wrote an understandable sentence and turned it into an exquisitely coherent paragraph. I looked like Tevya in “Fiddler on the Roof,” dancing his dance while singing, “If I were a Rich man!” Do you remember that? Of course, you do. It was the hottest play on Broadway last week. Or…maybe it’s been a little longer now.

I do ok with my writing of a blog post sometimes, but that’s because I read and re-read what I’ve written about ten thousand times, changing many things multitudinous times before posting. That was hyperbole, in case you missed it. As an aside, I like hyperbole. It’s the only lie you can tell without trying to mislead anybody.

Now I’ve gone and done it. I took a break to answer my phone from an “unknown” caller, and all I heard was a bunch of clicking on the other end. So, I “hung up” and spent too much time pondering what that might have been.

That’s unusual. It often takes much less than a mystery call to cause me to lose my train of thought. But that’s what I lost, my train of thought. And who I was addressing this post to in the first place. But whoever it was they were a large group. I can imagine there are many unrepentant sinners I, now, will not be boring by telling them their needs that I fret over not meeting. I can see that I will have to wait for another time when I remember to turn off my phone. Plus, I will write it all down first, checking it over ten thousand times and changing many things again.

Now I’m waiting for Grammarly’s algorithmic editor to come alive and give me their breathless alerts on suggested changes. Some items they suggest changing would change what I was saying completely. With just a few words and changed punctuation the whole train of thought can go sideways. Funny how that goes. I argue with them. They get testy. I didn’t know an algorithm could get testy. So, they tell me I should give up on writing because they’re spending all their resources on me when I put it to the test. Guess I’ll have to give them a special Christmas bonus for putting up with me. Although, they don’t know I trust the Savior for everything. It’s the only way I could ever get behind a pulpit or in front of a Bible class. I was getting on my knees in my office, sweating blood in prayer before a sermon and every class lesson. Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition! (Words, that is!)

-G.W.  (Just hoping to get better at something that I never felt at home doing in the first place. My second-year college English teacher took me under her wing and was present to see me write my first clear sentence and paragraph. She said she knew I could do it, as I had the “native ability.” Every time I think of that, I envision taking the few feathers out of my hair and covering my head with a Chieftain’s full headdress. Might help. No, that’s just imagination. I’ll accept God’s grace being sufficient for me and all the help He is willing to give me and call it good!).

Remember to love God today because He certainly loves you more! He even recorded it in the Bible for all eternity!

Prayer:

Thank you, Father God, for wrapping your salvation in human flesh in Jesus and that your way for me to respond to your grace involves my heart, soul, mind, and body! I thank you in Jesus’ most holy and precious name. Amen.


30 thoughts on “I’m Writing”

  1. Wow G W. To those of us who trust God for words to communicate, He does handle us a small box of words for assembly. He even make suggestions and hints as we follow HIm. I’ve enjoyed yours as the heart of Jesus comes through your words.

    Liked by 5 people

    1. Thanks, Gary. That’s so true. If I never thought of writing as God’s work, I certainly do now that He opened my eyes. Something this hard for me MUST be His work, and it’s Christ alone who keeps me at it.

      Liked by 4 people

  2. I so enjoy your posts, and if you really do ever tumble your words up, it sure doesn’t come out in your blog posts! You made my day reading that you read, read, and re-read because I thought I was the only one who did that! And I also struggle with the talking about self – so funny you mentioned that. It’s sort of what you do sometimes in blogging, but you’re trying to aim it back to Him. I’m still trying to find that balance. In any case, loved the post! Blessings, GW!

    Liked by 3 people

  3. I really enjoyed your post. I too find writing to be a struggle. I love how God uses each one of us in a unique way for His glory. I agree with Kendra, your blogs are understandable and a joy. I used to ask God why He didn’t make writing easier for me if He wanted me to do it. He answered, “You’d not seek Me, but would write what you thought was best.” Of course, He’s right, I would. Since then, I try to be thankful for the hard is what keeps me humble and focused upon Him. Thank you for sharing! God bless.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for your kind comment! Thank you for telling me how God answered you and how you resolved His answer: “I try to be thankful for the hard is what keeps me humble and focused upon Him.” For that’s His message to me as well, and how I resolved it. Thank you again! God bless!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Thanks for sharing more of yourself, GW!! I agree that talking about self is boring, because my joy is in Jesus🤗
    Some days a final post can take four hours or more, from its initiation…so you are certainly not alone. I enjoy your posts and respect your wisdom and I can read where God’s heart beats through your blog posts. I guess We learn to keep pressing past our insufficiencies, as we realize that our sufficiency is in Christ💕

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much, Tam, for that encouragement. Even though I thought to give it up so many times God keeps willing me to keep going. And my will isn’t willing to wrestle with God’s will. You are so right. My insufficiency is sufficient in the Saviors grace.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Although you find yourself uninteresting, you are one of the works God has created in His image, and so the other works He created find your thoughts to be interesting. I very much enjoyed — and related to — the expressions of your thoughts. Keep on being real, Gee Dub! Maranatha!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. That’s pretty honest, and when you can light it up it gives you room to grow.
    I write because of a fire in my spirit, not because I have a great intelligence. I know where I have come from, and I know Who brought me here, so I see them as His thoughts being written down by me.
    Thank you
    God bless you C. W.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for commenting, Pedro. Unless the fire of the Spirit burns in a man he can do nothing. So true. And it’s the same fire of the Spirit that keeps him going. God bless!

      Liked by 1 person

  7. GW, I greatly appreciate your candidness and applaud your college English prof who saw your “native ability.” Wouldn’t she smile to see your writing now. It’s my weaknesses that keep me humble and more dependent on God and I find He usually calls on me to serve Him in those weak areas. I could relate to your story but from a different angle. I struggled to learn how to read. Reading and writing are interconnected. Although I enjoyed the writing process my scores were always discouraging when compared to my classmates. It wasn’t until college that my English professor changed that narrative and drew me out of my writing bubble. That said, I rarely tell people I write a devotional blog because I don’t see myself as a writer. Why not? While others are putting out weekly or daily blogs plus writing books on the side, I feel abundantly blessed to even be able to put out a monthly lesson and that one has been well edited by myself and another before I hit publish. Keeps me completely reliant on Him. I am very happy with that. At the end of the day, it is all for His purpose and to His glory. Blessings GW!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Wow, Beth. I’m astonished you don’t see yourself as a writer. When I think of a gifted communicator you are the first person who comes to mind! Isn’t it odd how we can downgrade ourselves when we compare ourselves to those we think of as ideals. You made so many good points. This next is the one that will stay with me the longest: “…God and I find He usually calls on me to serve Him in those weak areas.” Looking back, it has always been in my weak areas where He used and uses me the most, as well. I hadn’t recognized that until you mentioned it here. Thank you for your encouragement once again! God bless you, Beth!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Thank you GW for your kinds words. They mean a lot. I have friends and acquaintances whose greatest dream is publishing a book one day. More than one has shared with me some chapters in progress. I guess I’ve always considered that dream/aspiration to be the requirement to be called a writer. Me on the other hand, I dream of getting Adi therapy dog certified and taking her to visit homebound veterans. If I get to share Lesson from a Lab on the way that would just be icing on the cake.

        Liked by 1 person

  8. I love this. I love how we’re all dependent on God. I love writing and often forget to proof comments. I can also speak and teach, some. But it’s not what I write or what I say, it’s when God takes over, and He uses me simply as a vessel, and I look back over my shoulder at what I just wrote or said and stand in awe knowing that *I* didn’t just do that; God did. I’m simply His vessel.

    I imagine, though, you’re great ministering to the sick and visiting them and even going to hospitals. All of that totally.freaks.me.out. My kids didn’t even want me caring for them when they were sick. My Husband is back in the hospital and will have surgery tomorrow. I freaked out in the ER and had to leave his room while calling for the nurse to go help him while I went outside for a good 30 minutes or so to calm down. Totally.freaks.me.out. Full.blown.panic.attacks.

    Sigh. Some of us are the voice, some are the hand, some are the nurturer, some are the writer, and you are you 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for your comment, Ame. I agree I am me and all are called by the Lord for different and individual duties. By the same token, I have noticed that of all things Christ has called me to do were in my weakest areas and outside any comfort zone ever I knew. I Believe it is the same for all He calls to a task. I also believe it is because He wants us to depend totally on Him. In this way He can build our trust in Him layer by layer. He becomes our comfort instead of us depending on our own frail confidence. In our weakness He displays His faithfulness. When we can’t He shows us that in Him we CAN.

      I am sorry you have so hard a time with hospital atmosphere. You are correct in assuming hospital visits come easy for me. They do, but not always. Sometimes I have been blind-sided not aware of what the injury was beforehand. I remember one time I reacted the way you just described when I was escorted to a room of a burn patient. The initial sight nearly put me into shock. But Christ quickly prevailed. As I approached the man the staff noted his vital signs began to quickly stabilize closer to the normal, they had been striving for with meds. That was before I could think to utter a prayer or call out to Jesus to strengthen ME. Jesus began working while I was struggling not to swoon. He is the miracle; we are His willing assistant. He doesn’t ask us to do it, but to be willing.

      I didn’t mean to be so wordy in my response to your comment. I just went with it when I remembered and re-lived that occurrence.

      Liked by 1 person

  9. What a beautiful story. Thank you for sharing it with me. I immediately thought of Isaiah 52:7 How beautiful upon the mountains
    Are the feet of him who brings good news,
    Who proclaims peace,
    Who brings glad tidings of good things,
    Who proclaims salvation,
    Who says to Zion,
    “Your God reigns!”

    And Ephesians 6:15
    and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace;

    How powerful the Holy Spirit of Holy God living inside you!

    I agree that we’re often in places where we need God’s power and strength. I believe that God does give us more than we can handle but it’s never more than He can handle 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I believe God leaves us ‘lacking’ in certain areas on purpose. As He said to Paul, ‘my grace is sufficient’. Hence we glory in Him and not our innate abilities. If you’re like me, sometimes I smile at a compliment because I know it was just Jesus…little to do with me. I’m just a conduit…😁

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Yes, I’m like you in that way. However, rather than being just a conduit we are a conduit He chose for a purpose by His decree. Within those parameters we do our best, still knowing our deficiencies and trusting He got His point across. It spooks me at times wondering if I messed up what He gave me. 😯

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